Must I?

On the edge of renewal
I stop to wonder
must I?

Do I have to lie down
On a bed of rusty nails
Just to make you know my name

Am I obliged to suffer the long, lorn path of hope
Not even knowing if my struggle is in vain
Without a nightingale singing high over the musty clouds
A pathfinder to guide me towards my approaching fate

Are all my dreams forlorn?
Have I wrecked it all in just one careless whip of the neck
Can years and years of hatred and injustice be undone
by diligent work and an ever-burning core of certainty?

Can I prove myself to an ignorant world
or will my attempts be consumed by the flames of authority
and unforgotten failures in the past?

Must I?
Will I?
Shall I?

Each step so treacherous.

– Malicia Frost


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